(Above: Me, the way my family is used to seeing me when I’m writing. Unpaid promotional note: I typed the majority of my novel in Google Docs on this little Samsung Chromebook, and loved it.)
And Some Shameless Self-Promotion
Is there anything more depressing than an abandoned blog? (Yes. Tons of things: war, starvation, disease, pollution, climate change, overpopulation, unintentionally mismatched socks…) Well, I didn’t mean to abandon my blog, even if no one was particularly alarmed or saddened by my absence. I’m back now, having dragged myself out of my novel, which has completely consumed me this past month.
My book, my baby (which took much longer to gestate than an actual baby), is finally, FINALLY, done—as good as I can possibly make it without driving myself insane. I sweated over every single comma; I scrutinized my words over and over and over again until my middle-aged eyes were begging for mercy; I questioned my character’s motives; I revised and rewrote and cut all I could stand to cut in four drafts.
And now I’ve taken the most absolutely terrifying next step: I’ve started sending out queries to literary agents, praying that one of them shares my sense of humor and likes my first ten pages enough to request more, and then more yet, and then, joy of joys, actually wants to represent me. I need to distract myself, because imagining those shiny, beautiful agents (seriously, ALL of them are shiny and beautiful) reading my letter and the start of my novel is making me feel queasy.
So, Happy Star Wars Day, everyone! May the Fourth be with you! Did you know that I’m married to a Star Wars geek? Yes! I have a Yoda cookie jar and Darth Vader toaster in my kitchen. No joke. My newer blog followers may have missed this old post: Are You Really Ready to Marry a Star Wars Geek? Please pass it along to anyone you may know who’s preparing to marry a Star Wars geek this spring, before it’s too late.
Mother’s Day will be here soon. I feel the need to draw your attention to my favorite “mom” posts, because I don’t know if I have the energy to come up with something new this year. My kids have sucked all the life out of me (no, they haven’t, but I’m feeling lazy, and it’s so easy and convenient to blame them). Here are my best “mommy humor” posts:
YummySlim Diet Candy and Powerbra Present the Miss Supermom USA Pageant
Detective Mom and the Case of the Missing Shoe
The Unexpected Perks of Parenthood
On a more serious note, I’d like to say Happy Mother’s Day to my mom, right here in public. She has been nothing but supportive my entire life, and I love the fact that I am slowly morphing into a benevolently mutated version of her as I age. (Wouldn’t it be hilarious if this is the one and only blog post of mine that she doesn’t read?) I LOVE YOU, MOM!
My lilac bushes are blooming and not a single one of those shiny, beautiful agents has rejected my novel yet, so, for now, I’m at peace.
Popcorn and Pigtails 
I read your blog to Mom.
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Best of luck with your book! I hope it has a happy journey. And…lilacs are my favorite. I’m waiting for them to bloom in my neighborhood, too.
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So, every time I try to sign in to word press it tells me that my email doesn’t exist. Then, try to go through Google, as suggested, and I have to remember a password which I obviously don’t. I’ll just have to respond this way…..
No matter what any agents may say look how far you have gotten in this process. That may not be of any comfort to you but to those of us who longed to write…..You’ve actually written a whole book! Now, you are sending it out which takes guts and determination. You are my literary hero!
Love, Mom
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